I balance, I weave, I dodge, I frolic, and my bills are all paid. On weekends, to let off steam, I participate in full-contact origami. Years ago I discovered the meaning of life but forgot to write it down. I have made extraordinary four course meals using only a mouli and a toaster oven. I breed prizewinning clams. Now which one of those is fake? Good luck.

My Ideal Person Ideal person? Martha Stewart meets Ricki Raxxx? Sexy body that can make a delicious panini. Sounds about right! There is no "ideal" person unless we dive deep into the dark underground. Someone who can hang out laugh watch comedies and have amazing sex with? Is that better? Ha ha