AgoraCosmopolitan Dating

No One Can Make You Feel Inferior Without Your Consent  

sexyldy1000 65F  
10295 posts
3/22/2021 5:30 pm
No One Can Make You Feel Inferior Without Your Consent



Life is tough. Most of us don't have things simply handed t.o us. Along the way. we will encounter all kinds of people, many of who will try t.o stand in our way of success. They may try different techniques including trying to make us feel inferior. I posted about this before and felt it timely to share it again.

No One Can Make You Feel Inferior Without Your Consent

These words are a remarkably insightful statement about self-esteem. When I saw them in a daily newsletter, I wanted t.o understand their origin.

Eleanor Roosevelt uttered that phrase about an awkward event in β€œ1935”. The Secretary of Labor in the Roosevelt administration was invited t.o give a speech at the University of California, Berkeley . The customary hostess of the event was unhappy because she felt that the chosen speaker should not have been a political figure. She refused t.o serve as the host and several newspapers viewed her action as a rebuff and an insult.

When Mrs. Roosevelt was asked at a White House press conference whether the Secretary had been snubbed, her response was widely reported. β€œA snub,” defined the first lady, β€œis the effort of a person who feels superior t.o make someone else feel inferior. T.o do so, he has t.o find someone who can be made t.o feel inferior.”

Throughout my lifetime, I have encountered people who tried t.o use this tactic. With maturity and life’s experience, I realized it has everything t.o do with them and nothing t.o do with m.e. They often have insecurities and it helps them t.o feel better about themselves if others are unhappy. A happy person will not be motivated t.o make others feel miserable.

I am a strong, confident, resilient woman who has faced many challenges head-on. I do remind myself of this, counting each as a blessing with the refusal t.o be made t.o feel inferior by someone else’s insecurities.


@Quote Investigator



sexyldy1000 65F  
9606 posts
3/22/2021 5:37 pm

Have you encountered people like this? How did you handle them?


Paulxx001 65M  
22616 posts
3/22/2021 8:21 pm

I've met many people who have a problem when one disagrees with their pov. They take it personally and retreat, shrivel, rather than acknowledge differing opinions. Discussions, however heated, should still end up at the same conclusion; it's a forum.

TRUE, you can't be made to feel inferior without YOUR consent. But on the other hand, every single time anyone strays from your way of thinking β€” shouldn't be an excuse to presume their motives are corrupt.

I'm not a vegan β€” don't try and convince me to become one. My daughter has adopted that lifestyle. It doesn't mean things have changed between us, although our conversations have been heated. We both get it and agree to move along.

People today have THIN skins. No matter what you say or how you say it β€” someone will get pissed off. Fragile is a word I carry for the silly fricken glass dishes in my damn cupboard. Now THERE'S where I've got to be careful!

My permission is my prerogative. I'd say, I won't overuse that term. Otherwise, I'll find myself searching for an echo. And who the fuck wants one of those? πŸ€”...


sweet0necter 48F  
2059 posts
3/22/2021 9:08 pm

For me it depends on who it is. A coworker yes I can feel inferior. However a double on here telling me I'm a loser, a joke, etc.. nah none of that.. like you said it reveals more about them then me.


Solfan55 67M
500 posts
3/23/2021 9:58 am

I suspect we've all had someone like that in our lives at some point. I've met plenty of people that would have been considered "inferior" based on their station in life but that never held them back in their self-belief.


Tmptrzz 59F  
107038 posts
3/23/2021 11:02 am

Eleanor Roosevelt was a true humanitarian that did so much for the people of our country and around the world. This is a great quote, thanks for sharing it with all of us as it really is true. I hope your Tuesday is a terrific one..

Seduce the mind and see what a wonderful adventure the body will take you on..


sexyldy1000 65F  
9606 posts
3/23/2021 5:59 pm

    Quoting sweet0necter:
    For me it depends on who it is. A coworker yes I can feel inferior. However a double on here telling me I'm a loser, a joke, etc.. nah none of that.. like you said it reveals more about them then me.
According to Merriam-Webster, the definition of inferior is "of little or less importance, value, or merit". I can defer to someone who is more intelligent or experienced than me, but it does not make me feel inferior. It does say a lot about others who intentionally set out to make another person feel less than worthy.


sexyldy1000 65F  
9606 posts
3/23/2021 7:22 pm

    Quoting Solfan55:
    I suspect we've all had someone like that in our lives at some point. I've met plenty of people that would have been considered "inferior" based on their station in life but that never held them back in their self-belief.
Successful people are able to rise above their surroundings and perceived shortcomings.


sexyldy1000 65F  
9606 posts
3/23/2021 7:25 pm

    Quoting Tmptrzz:
    Eleanor Roosevelt was a true humanitarian that did so much for the people of our country and around the world. This is a great quote, thanks for sharing it with all of us as it really is true. I hope your Tuesday is a terrific one..
I read up on her history and she was an amazing and accomplished woman.


sexyldy1000 65F  
9606 posts
3/23/2021 7:29 pm

    Quoting Paulxx001:
    I've met many people who have a problem when one disagrees with their pov. They take it personally and retreat, shrivel, rather than acknowledge differing opinions. Discussions, however heated, should still end up at the same conclusion; it's a forum.

    TRUE, you can't be made to feel inferior without YOUR consent. But on the other hand, every single time anyone strays from your way of thinking β€” shouldn't be an excuse to presume their motives are corrupt.

    I'm not a vegan β€” don't try and convince me to become one. My daughter has adopted that lifestyle. It doesn't mean things have changed between us, although our conversations have been heated. We both get it and agree to move along.

    People today have THIN skins. No matter what you say or how you say it β€” someone will get pissed off. Fragile is a word I carry for the silly fricken glass dishes in my damn cupboard. Now THERE'S where I've got to be careful!

    My permission is my prerogative. I'd say, I won't overuse that term. Otherwise, I'll find myself searching for an echo. And who the fuck wants one of those? πŸ€”...
You always provide an interesting and different perspective.


resant78 43M  
3326 posts
3/23/2021 10:21 pm

When I was in 7th grade I was bullied by several bigger kids. I was an easy target because I was younger and smaller compared to the other kids in my same grade.

I told my mom and the advice she gave me was to not let them know you are scared and to pretend it doesn't bother you. (which in hindsight is probably not the bets advice.) Anyhow, I did that and it kinda worked. It didn't make me feel any better, but at least things never escalated.
Then I took matters into my own hands and seek the help of my teachers.
That put a stop to things right away, and thankfully that was the end of that.
As I got older and went into 8th grade and above I was catching up (physically) to the other kids.


sexyldy1000 65F  
9606 posts
3/24/2021 5:00 am

    Quoting resant78:
    When I was in 7th grade I was bullied by several bigger kids. I was an easy target because I was younger and smaller compared to the other kids in my same grade.

    I told my mom and the advice she gave me was to not let them know you are scared and to pretend it doesn't bother you. (which in hindsight is probably not the bets advice.) Anyhow, I did that and it kinda worked. It didn't make me feel any better, but at least things never escalated.
    Then I took matters into my own hands and seek the help of my teachers.
    That put a stop to things right away, and thankfully that was the end of that.
    As I got older and went into 8th grade and above I was catching up (physically) to the other kids.
It saddens me about the prevalence of bullying in schools that continues. My daughter went through it at a similar age and it has had a lifelong impact. Glad you found a way out of it.


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