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Out of the mouths of others...  

secret_lade 46F
6310 posts
8/6/2020 5:47 pm
Out of the mouths of others...


Downstairs Neighbor - Somebody stole my fucking lighter out of my truck! I can't fucking believe it! I need to start locking that thing up! That lighter was $1.49! What is going on??? (talk-yelling to mother on phone)

Spawn - Do you mind? The only thing I've heard for the last 5 minutes is you crunching. Eat your ice elsewhere.... (dirty looks shot my way)

Random Gym Guy - Oh yah.... that's it.... you got this.... you're a bad ass.... (watching own reflection in mirror)

Work BFF - I hope you know I was only joking in the 2 o'clock meeting. You know I wasn't serious.... I really appreciate everything you do. (that's a funny way of showing it)

Middle - Mom! Do you want to wear my headphones? You can wear them on the treadmill. (some days, the only person on earth who loves me. And he's leaving.)

Me - I think I give up. (exasperated)

The 60 Year Old Cindy Lou Who at Work - Don't look so sad, Hunny Bunny. I hate it when you look so sad. (I was leaving work. She and her sister are quite literally the sweetest people on earth.)

Pete and Repeat - I'm locked out. The damn computer won't take my password again. (third time this week)

IT Support Guy - Didn't I talk to you on Wednesday? Are you a Gemini by any chance? (No, and no)

Old Lady on the Kitchen Floor in the TV commercial - I've fallen... And I can't get up. (that one just made me laugh)

Happy Thursday!

secret_lade 46F
4245 posts
8/8/2020 7:05 am

    Quoting WyoCowboy7751:
    Been a short time ago, I remember talking with my daughter ; She let out a huge sneeze !! 6 year old Son/Grandson suddenly popped up and said, " Oh no , mom , that was a covid sneeze" !!
Ha ha ha... That's cute! I coughed at work yesterday out on the sales floor and I heard a customer gasp and reach for their mask.


secret_lade 46F
4245 posts
8/8/2020 7:01 am

    Quoting lindoboy100:
    Always knew you'd be a good listener McLade!

    Funniest think I've heard in ages was the sweet wee old lady in front of me in the queue at the shop farting. By god it was a stinker, but I near peed myself laughing.

    See! I'm a good listener too!!
Yikes! LOL Too many brussel sprouts? LOL


secret_lade 46F
4245 posts
8/8/2020 7:00 am

    Quoting BiggLala:
    Customer at work approaching my register...

    Me: How you doing?
    Her: I gotta shit!!!
    Me: Ummm...uhhh...*busts out laughing*...that's a bit TMI, but I appreciate your honesty. It's kinda refreshing.
    Her: Yeah, it just hit me as I was going through the store. It's so bad I'm sweating.
    Me: Well...let's get you through this line in a hurry. Don't drive too fast going home!
It's amazing what customers feel the need to share with retail workers. I've heard about emotional problems, sex lives, haunted houses, questionable rashes.... LOL Just yesterday I was doing a store tour with new employees and a lady asked me where the post its were. Now, you would think the moment I showed her where they were it would end the conversation, but it did not. I then went on to hear all about her inability to control her children and how her ex wanted to take them away and she was going to utilize a post it system to get her life back together.

Um.... Yah.


secret_lade 46F
4245 posts
8/8/2020 6:55 am

    Quoting jolielaide:
    i wish i could be drunk at 10am. i can count on one hand how many drinks i've had to get me through this quarantine of self-isolation and loathing - UGH!! my sisters drink every day. every. day. idk how they do it.
I've cut back drastically on my drinking... I was doing it pretty much every day as well. New year, better me....


secret_lade 46F
4245 posts
8/8/2020 6:53 am

    Quoting Paulxx001:
    It's been a fun week all right.
I'm certainly glad it's Saturday morning, I slept in, and the only thing on my agenda for today is BEACH. Woo Hoo!


secret_lade 46F
4245 posts
8/8/2020 6:52 am

    Quoting lonlyforlove2:
    Have a good daay, looks like it stared OK!!!! Be safe, be well
You have a good day too!


secret_lade 46F
4245 posts
8/7/2020 6:41 pm

    Quoting mc_justmc:
    Funniest thing I heard was when I was taking out the trash one morning:

    Lynda de la Mooch: Will y'all stop fighting, it's Thanksgiving!!!!
    Her Mom: Well, it's 10am in the morning and your Father is drunk!!!
When I first got divorced I briefly lived next door to a lady that I called Profanity Lady. She was constantly yelling at her husband, but the one I remember most was when she screamed at him "Ya Fucking Einstein! That's what I said!!"


WyoCowboy7751 67M
718 posts
8/7/2020 4:56 am

Been a short time ago, I remember talking with my daughter ; She let out a huge sneeze !! 6 year old Son/Grandson suddenly popped up and said, " Oh no , mom , that was a covid sneeze" !!


lindoboy100 57M
22184 posts
8/7/2020 2:21 am

Always knew you'd be a good listener McLade!

Funniest think I've heard in ages was the sweet wee old lady in front of me in the queue at the shop farting. By god it was a stinker, but I near peed myself laughing.

See! I'm a good listener too!!

Pull ma finger.........


lindoboy100 57M
22184 posts
8/7/2020 2:19 am

    Quoting BiggLala:
    Customer at work approaching my register...

    Me: How you doing?
    Her: I gotta shit!!!
    Me: Ummm...uhhh...*busts out laughing*...that's a bit TMI, but I appreciate your honesty. It's kinda refreshing.
    Her: Yeah, it just hit me as I was going through the store. It's so bad I'm sweating.
    Me: Well...let's get you through this line in a hurry. Don't drive too fast going home!


That's a conversation I've had with myself and others many times!

Pull ma finger.........


BiggLala 48F  
28829 posts
8/6/2020 10:35 pm

Customer at work approaching my register...

Me: How you doing?
Her: I gotta shit!!!
Me: Ummm...uhhh...*busts out laughing*...that's a bit TMI, but I appreciate your honesty. It's kinda refreshing.
Her: Yeah, it just hit me as I was going through the store. It's so bad I'm sweating.
Me: Well...let's get you through this line in a hurry. Don't drive too fast going home!

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jolielaide 49F  
1441 posts
8/6/2020 9:52 pm

    Quoting mc_justmc:
    Funniest thing I heard was when I was taking out the trash one morning:

    Lynda de la Mooch: Will y'all stop fighting, it's Thanksgiving!!!!
    Her Mom: Well, it's 10am in the morning and your Father is drunk!!!
i wish i could be drunk at 10am. i can count on one hand how many drinks i've had to get me through this quarantine of self-isolation and loathing - UGH!! my sisters drink every day. every. day. idk how they do it.


Paulxx001 63M
16404 posts
8/6/2020 7:54 pm

It's been a fun week all right.


lonlyforlove2 77M
16832 posts
8/6/2020 7:16 pm

Have a good daay, looks like it stared OK!!!! Be safe, be well

Be sure to look in at lonlyforlove2 . It may make you smile


mc_justmc 60M  
6490 posts
8/6/2020 6:40 pm

Funniest thing I heard was when I was taking out the trash one morning:

Lynda de la Mooch: Will y'all stop fighting, it's Thanksgiving!!!!
Her Mom: Well, it's 10am in the morning and your Father is drunk!!!


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